Dugo punching straight through the office wall into open space

Notice of Resignation — effective immediately

HE QUIT
SO YOU
DON'T HAVE TO.

Nine years in a cubicle. Zero promotions. One (1) laptop, deceased. Dugo didn't rage-quit — he broke through. Now he's a coin.

Buy $DUGO Follow the Breakout
▲ RAGE QUIT INDEX +999% ▼ PATIENCE −100% ▲ COFFEE INTAKE +430% ▼ LAPTOPS SURVIVED −1 ▼ MEETINGS ATTENDED −∞ ▲ $DUGO HOLDERS +∞
FROM THE DESK OF: DUGO CASE FILE #0420
Dugo's official employee photo, deeply unimpressed EMPLOYEE
PHOTO

To whom it may concern,

I am writing to inform you that after 9 years, 4 months, and one (1) unhinged Tuesday, I am no longer available for meetings that could've been emails, feedback that could've been silence, or a chair that has personally wronged me.

Effective immediately, I will be redirecting 100% of my energy into something with actual upside: $DUGO.

I am not sorry. I am not available. I am not coming back for the goodbye cake.

— Dugo

Annual performance review

The numbers
don't lie.

F 1 Rage Quits Filed
A+ ∞ Meetings Skipped
F 94% Coffee-to-Blood Ratio
A+ MAX Diamond Hands

Personnel file

Four moods.
One employee.

Dugo, eyes wide, seeing the chart for the first time
NO. 04-20 SAW THE CHART
Dugo shaking, drinking coffee straight from the pot with both hands
NO. 08-15 RUNNING ON FUMES
Dugo face down on the ground, completely wiped out
NO. 13-02 FACE DOWN, STILL HOLDING
Dugo leaping away from his office chair with pure joy
NO. 00-01 OFFICIALLY UNEMPLOYED
Dugo walking away down the path, back turned, heading toward the moon

Last seen: parking lot B

Walking into
the next chart.

No two-weeks notice. No exit interview. Just $DUGO and a full tank.

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